Dear friend, I hope this little message finds you well and reveling in the invitation of this day. Each time I have attempted to write what feels like my first ‘real’ blog post for this new adventure, I find myself creating a story about all of the ways I will fall short, all of the things that make me not good enough, and all of the reasons that I am unworthy of your time, attention, trust. This story and the analysis paralysis of swirling that follows it comes from the part of me that is insecure and afraid. In sitting with that fear, I have come to recognize that it is easier to spin a made-up story where I have already failed, BUT, in all actuality, even that isn’t what I am REALLY afraid of.
I know intimately (and I bet you do too) what Marianne Williamson wrote about so beautifully in her book A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the [Love] that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
When I was a little girl, I was afraid of the dark. As a 38-year-old woman, I am afraid of the light. Yet, here you are! Reading these words! Instead of continuing to be afraid and letting that stifle me, I am (all-the-while-my-knees-are-knocking) being courageous and, therefore, set free.
Is there any other way worth living? Here is my commitment to you, to me, to life: I will show up and stand in the light, even when I am afraid. I will lean in. I will trust in the pure potential that lies within me (and you and everyone), even when unworthiness rears her ugly head. I will listen carefully. I will speak honestly, even when being silent seems easier. I will move courageously from my heart. I will stand in integrity. I will embody love, compassion, and kindness. On this Memorial Day and every day, let’s remember who we are and let this knowing illuminate every step of the way.